This is a letter written by the twelve year old Midshipman, George Perceval, to his parents on Christmas Day 1806, one year after he fought in the Battle of Trafalgar with Admiral Nelson. Aside from being a bona fide seaman and consumate badass before hitting puberty, he was also a twelve year old drunkard:
"My dear Papa & dear Momma,
I take this opportunity of writing to you to inform you that I shall go on board the Sabrina the first opportunity that offers itself. Momma, I assure you that I did not forget the promise that I made for I eat some Christmas Pye and drunk all your healths and wished you all a long, happy and merry life. This letter besides contains my best love and a kiss to all. Fare you all well a thousand times and good bye.
your very dutiful son
George James Perceval"
He drank to their healths like a champ. If you look carefully, you can see the exact point where he pounded a Jaegerbomb for his auntie's mumps.
Really though, even tanked, this twelve year old was able to say what I want to say this Christmas better than I could, so take his letter as my own. Today, I'm going to eat some pie and drink to the health of my friends and family. If you are reading this, you can be assured that at some point today, I have thought of you. Fare you all well a thousand times and good bye. Cheers.
A very special Christmas carol as performed by a very drunk Harry Nilsson: